my soul cries out.. or the significance of paint

I have long thought that if I could have a HUGE canvas and big buckets full to the brim with colours, and if I could THROW paint at the canvas, while screaming or crying,
probably both, that I would be healed.

That I would be all better!

I tried flinging paint from a regular sized paintbrush at a piece of paper stapled tothe wall..and
nothing happened..

perhaps it wasn't a big enough canvas..

perhaps it was because I didn't scream!